Monday, February 7, 2005

Dental Rant

It's been almost ten years since I've been to a dentist.  I was scheduled for a "possible" root canal today.  But apparently I'm blessed with strong teeth.

No root canal for this chickie (not today) -- just preparation for a crown, which involved drilling off the old filling (fine by me, it was heavy metal).  Three shots of novocain and still I was jumping in the seat. 

"Uhh gock, rhy's i-hootig knee so nuck?"  [translated, "Uhh doc, why's it hurting me so much?"]

"I don't know, you're just sensitive I guess.  Ten more seconds."




Ten seconds. My count.  I punched her.  I swear, it was a reflex.

A few moments later, she was building the crown area (or whatever they do to torture those of us with small mouths).

"Stop moving your tongue."

I didn't know I was moving my tongue.

"Open wider."

Um, I think you'll find my jaw somewhere in my lap.

"Stop pushing with your tongue.  Breathe through your nose."

Let's see, I'm gagging on my tongue.  Would you rather I breathe through my throat or throw up on you?  It's your call.

90 minutes in the chair.
15 minutes of actual work on my mouth.
100 bucks down.
900 to go.
4 weeks of soft foods.
That adds up to one gigantic headache.
And I think...yep...the novocain is finally kicking in.

Oh yeah.  I'll be changing dentists.


ladydriversammie said...

You're a hell of a lot braver than me chick.  I don't go to dentists at all, and if my teeth fall out, so be it!  I have a sever phobia (no idea why, just do) and I'm practically breaking out in hives here just listening to you recount your dentist visit.  ::shivering::

Sammie  :)

sieblonde said...

Ouch..  glad the worst is over!  Well, sometimes writing those checks is almost as painful.  ~Sie

viviansullinwank said...

{{{{{Freeee}}}}}  your teeth are too pretty to have gone 10 years without seeing a dentist!  You obviously take wonderful care of them!!    Sounds like a horrible visit you had!  :(     Loved the photos below!!!


diannevan said...

I think it'd hurt my wallet even more than my mouth!!

alphawoman1 said...

Ouch.  That is just not right!  I have a dentist who is intent on drilling out all my old fillings and replacing them!  Joe calls him  Dr. Death.  Once I felt light headed and thought I was going to pass out (they always use a devise that feels like thin rubber strapped across the back teeth so the shards don't go racing down my throat) and I could not breath. He was so cool, he had that damn thing off in seconds and my head was between my knees with me trying to not faint.  He was so nice...he rubbed the back of my neck until I came to!  I hat the dentist office, but like Dr. Death.

babyshark28 said...

I don't like dentists at all...
it's been too long already, but it hasn't been 10 years...good lord. :p

which reminds me...I need to make an appointment.

sunflowerkat321 said...

I'm a complete dental phobe.  I resorted to a hypnotherapist to get to where I could cope with anything beyond a cleaning.  And I still dislike going...I just don't break out into hives.

slowmotionlife said...

Dental sadists!!!  GAHHHH!!!  Hate 'em.  Necessary evil and all that.  I like the punching idea.  A reflex?  Good excuse.  I might have to use that one.  LOL  :P

ryanagi said...

Oooooh yeah...I've had some real winners work on my teeth in the past. I like the guy I have now. He seems to have a hands off policy. He won't touch my teeth unless I beg (like when my cracked tooth repair fell off and I looked like Jim Carrey in Dumb & Dumber) or there is a serious problem.