Thursday, April 1, 2004

Burn Baby Burn

My roommate doesn't have a keen sense of smell.  It's the strangest thing.  He can't smell the sweet things in life, like vanilla or flowers or fresh cut grass.  But there's an upside.  He can't smell the stench from the kitchen trash.  He can't smell previous Hunny-markings on the livingroom rug.  And he can't smell his own cologne.

This morning he couldn't smell the piles of sage he left burning in his bathroom.  This I can understand.  However, I don't understand how he couldn't see the thick smoke filling our apartment.  I can hardly speak right now from smoke inhalation.  He had fallen asleep with sage burning.  Time to check the smoke detectors.

It took me three hard knocks on his bedroom door and a few loud calls to wake him up.  It took another three explanations urging him to rush to his bathroom and extinguish the burning sage.

His bedroom is on the opposite side of the apartment.  His bathroom window can't be viewed from inside the building.  But I could smell the sage from my bathroom window.  That means it made its way to the outside of the apartment - and back in again!

The lame thing about this is, he doesn't even have a reason to burn sage.  He's not clearing the energy.  He's not chanting or saying prayers.  He just likes the smell.  And since we've already established his sense of smell, that also means sage has to be burning like wildfire for him to get a good whiff of it.  But again, how could he not see the smoke?

Now I know why I woke up feeling so groggy and 'heady'.  Aside from the splitting headache I went to bed with last night, today my throat is dry and scratchy.  And the stale-smoke smell is still in my nose - even after a hot shower!  But at least I don't have to sing today.  And I sound a teeny-tiny bit like Demi Moore.  Oh sure, there's always a silver lining.


andreakingme said...

Well, holy smokes. This is amusing on so many levels. (Sorry. I know you probably don't think it's amusing. Here. Have a 'shroon.)

Demi Moore sounds sexy. You sexy sounding minx, you! Do an audio entry. Now! Do it. Your fans demand it. Yeah. Demand it.

slowmotionlife said...

LoL... the Demi Moore voice... rawrrrr... CALL ME!! I wanna hear it, already. LOL Tell that boy to watch it before he burns the apartment down. tehehe.. [You having a blog-a-thon or have I just really been gone THAT long???] Luv you!

babyshark28 said...

Well, that's kind of scary. Smoke filling the apartment, and him not noticing or smelling it. :(
I've got a cold going on too...scratchy throat. Sinus's filled with cement. But, I don't have to sing....and I don't sound like Demi Moore. where's my silver lining? :) xo

geminiwilder said...

Wow, lucky you guys didn't have a fire! I think you should definitely do an audio entry! and tell us all about the show last night in your sexy Demi voice!
hope you feel better soon!!!!! phinney

mallory4284 said...

eek, scary. LoL about Demi Moore. When my mom used to teach kindergarten I remember one day she came home and said that one of her students said she sounded like Demi Moore cause she was sick. Who knew kindergartners even knew who Demi Moore was! Tell that roommate of yours to try not to burn the apartment down anymore!

-- Mallory

aims814 said...

Thank God you're okay! Get those batteries changed in your smoke alarm! xo

bridgetteleigh75 said...

I bet he'd be able to smell one of Parker's masterpieces...aka his dirty diapers. LOL I think you'd have to be pretty much dead NOT to smell those suckers.

And if you sound like Demi Moore...what famous dog does Hunny sound like when he barks? <grin>

jennipooh3597 said...

Okay...can I giggle yet? :::pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee?::: ROFL! The boy almost burns down the apt. w/ sage! LOLOL Yeah, some clearing, babe! Thanks! Did he buy like a stalk? (I think you can well assume that your apt. is now free of all negative energy? Perchance? ;) Glad you are alive and well...and CLEAR!!!! he he L, Jenn

donah42 said...

Burning sage! Ugh! I hate that smell--maybe that means I'm evil? Smells like really bad pot to me!

krobbie67 said...

mmmh sounds like burning sage isn't all for his benefit but maybe to mask other smells???? But, really, do you have to have a reason to burn something? Sometimes, I get crazy and light a candle in the middle of the day just for the sake of having a candle burning. After all, some of those cheap ones have no smell at all. Teeheehee. ;-) ---Robbie

freeepeace said...

MALLORY - Kindergarteners knowing who Demi Moore is. That's my goal. To be famous enough that they'll know MY name. :P

MIA - Right. Gotta check the smoke detectors. I keep forgetting.

BRIDGETT - There's a good chance my roommate would NOT be able to smell Parker's leftovers. He's almost stepped on Hunny's before...without a clue! Let's see, I sound like Demi and Hunny's bark sounds like Snoopy?

JENN - Yes, you can giggle. Let out roaring laughter if you'd like. We are free of demons around here...'cept my own!

DONAH - For a long time I didn't like the smell of sage. Now it comforts me [unless I'm suffocating in it]. But sometimes it does have a funky smell.

ROBBIE - Perhaps it's to mask other smells. But he wouldn't even know. No, never need a reason to burn something. I burn sage, insence and candles often. But when your roommate is a middle-aged child, ya gotta be cautious.

freeepeace said...

ANDREA - Holy Smokes woulda been a better entry title! It was amusing on some levels. But not in my body all day. I suffered a headache and smelled burning sage in my nose even when I wasn't home. The smell is STILL here. But of course, HE can't smell it.

SLOMO - So, all it takes is a Demi-voice to get you on the phone? :P No blog-a-thon here. Where you been? :)

SHARKY - Your silver lining is in that you don't have to sing. Feel better - take care of that throat. :)

PHINNEY - Great idea about the audio entry about the show in a Demi voice. Too bad we missed the moment. :P

musenla said...

Yes, it's definitely time to check those smoke detectors!  I'm trying to imagine the smell of burning sage, I don't imagine it's pleasant for very long.  Sage has a very strong heady scent, I use it to cook sometimes and a little goes a long way.  

Perhaps your roommate can just buy some sage oil and use a warmer to heat it up?  Then again, it can be dangerous too if he forgets to put it out before going to sleep.  Perhaps a sage sachet, that's it!

somenuttychic said...

Maybe he should burn the sage in his bedroom. With the door closed. And a towel stuffed into the opening at the bottom. Then he'd get a REALLY good whiff of his smokey pile of stuff. Ah, the joy of roommates.