Sunday, December 14, 2003

Ah-Ha on Writing

I've been listening to such great music lately.  I go through extreme phases where I just can't get enough of a certain artist or song or style of music.  To the point where it haunts me in my sleep.  [I've written a few songs in my sleep/dreams]  Then I go through phases where music bores me or grates on my nerves, making me anxious.  These phases can last for weeks, sometimes months.  When I'm done with a "round" of music-listening, I find silence to be most comforting.

I had an epiphany last night that because I'm so moved by the music I love today, I find it impossible to write my own music.  These artists are saying it all, better than I can in this moment.  I'm bored with my own music.  Since I now understand that I go through these phases, I have to surrender to the process.  I may be bored right now but this is the honing process.  I have to trust that.  I can't think about writing a good song.  It just has to happen.  So, just in case, I've been sitting around with my guitar in hand for the past few days.  Before I had a computer, I wrote all my songs in longhand.  So I have notebooks all over the apartment, open and ready for that moment of inspiration. 

Another thing I thought of [and this makes sense to me] is that I've been writing a lot lately.  My creative writing has been taking a different form - being spilled all over this journal, in emails, in comments, even in my website and instant messages.  Not to mention my personal journaling.  One can only write so much!

It's all good!  Something's happening inside.  I trust.

6 comments:

aynetal3 said...

Happy to see that, "It's all good! Something's happening inside. I trust," stamp of self-approval. We figure you must be workin on something real big with all the extra introspection you've been doing of late! Breathe in each moment anew! Love ya, Us

slowmotionlife said...

"Something's happening inside." <-- I have feelings like that too sometimes. But I think mine's just digestion. :P

You're definitely in writing mode here. I can remember a few days when I thought you were going to let the journal go. Now, here you are, power-blogging away. Amazing. Keep it up!

clarity4today said...

I think you are right. One can only write so much. Sometimes your creativity takes a different turn. Maybe your mind just wants to "let it out" in slightly different form. I'm just glad we are getting to share it. :-)

freeepeace said...

Ayn, you speak my language. I adore you - all 20 of you! SloMo, hardyharhar! Next time you get that feeling, check! I'm pretty confident you'll find it's creativity brewing! :P Curious: What made you think I would let my journal go? Donna, right, seems this is how my writing wants to come out and it's a mighty force...I can't stop it. But I do notice it's effect on my [non]songwriting ::sigh:: Again, I trust.

andreakingme said...

I like reading this side of you -- very expressive and description. I like, I like. Writing is a VERY good thing. If you kind of let your mind go and write what comes into your head first, pretty soon you'll forget you're even writing.

freeepeace said...

<<If you kind of let your mind go and write what comes into your head first, pretty soon you'll forget you're even writing.>> Andrea, right on [write on?] hehe It's what I'd call channeling. Seems when I think, I can't write.