Friday, October 17, 2003

Meme - part 1

This past week some fellow journalers have stirred a bunch of emotions and I haven't been able to shake thoughts of my grandmother (Meme). A strong, independent woman, legally blind for as long as I knew her (but able to see thanks to the marvels of medicine).  She was always partying, planning trips with friends, dancing, joking, laughing. One of the funniest stories I remember her telling us was when she met her second husband. They met at a social event, danced for a bit, had some punch, took an evening stroll and sat on a park bench.  As they gazed at each other, he said, "You have beautiful eyes." She smiled, tilted her head a bit, put her hand on his and said, "Thank you, they're not mine." They laughed for the rest of their lives. I was surprised when Meme died a few years ago. I just thought she would live forever.

She loved me. She loved my singing. To her, I was a "hot ticket." I moved across country and for a long time I wasn't able to face her, as I was dealing with some truth about her son (my father). I just thought if I was honest with her, it would kill her. She died anyway - without knowing me as an adult. Without knowing my truth. But that's okay. She didn't need to know. She never heard the music I wrote. But I know she hears me now. This is for her. 

(continued) 

4 comments:

slowmotionlife said...

Freeepeace, this is a sad entry, but still full of hope and I thank you for that. Question: If there was one thing you wish you could have shown to your grandmother while she was alive, one truth, what would it be? What would you give her of yourself?

freeepeace said...

SloMo - I have sat with your question all day. I was about to answer with my very first thought but I wondered if I needed to delve deeper for the "truest" answer. I sit. I think. I feel. and still the answer remains: FORGIVENESS. It's the only way to set any one of us free. Thank you for your heartfelt question. And for your spirit, always. ~peace~

slowmotionlife said...

It's a great answer. Really.

aims814 said...

Freee, thanks for sharing this. I never tire of reading your words. They seem to flow so freely from you. :) Forgiveness: great answer! And something we all need to become close friends with.